If Only
by Bereft
Summary: For a moment she felt as if she could tell him, felt the words on the tip of her tongue, felt as if the burden had already been lifted off her shoulders. She nearly collapsed in tears as that moment passed away as quickly as it had come. ElladanOFC.


**Just a random one-shot. I felt like writing fluffy mortal/elf love. :-)**

Wind blew forcefully from behind her, her dress pulling painfully at her ankles, urging her ever forward. Her breathing was ragged as she staggered up the grassy hill, one of many, the crisp air burning her throat as she inhaled. Her dark blonde hair was a whirlwind around her, never ceasing to block her vision as it whipped out wildly in all directions. Yet none of these things kept the grin from her face, or the joy from her heart. Each step she took was a step closer to Elladan.

_Oh,_ how she adored him.

He didn't know, of course. The probability of him ever knowing was slight, as her fear of rejection was an obstacle she felt she simply was not capable of overcoming. He was an elf, after all, and she a human. She was clumsy and short, with hands rough from numerous days of field work. She dimmed in comparison to the willowy, graceful elves, with skin silken smooth and white as milk. No, she would not delude herself into believing she could ever gain his affections. She considered herself fortunate to have him as a dear friend, and had resolved to not expect more than that.

"Wyn!"

Had she arrived already? Surely she would have seen him! Hastily smoothing locks of hair back, she spotted Elladan in the distance. With a giggle of delight she lifted the hem of her dress, surging forward, a wide smile adorning her lips.

"Elladan!"

Suddenly the sounds of nature faded away; the soft rustle of wind through grass, the singing of birds, the buzzing of bees. She was deaf to all. Conscious only of the blood roaring through her ears, the thunderous beat of her heart, as it overwhelmed and consumed her.

Then she was in his arms.

"I have missed you," she whispered, knowing he would hear that which a human would not.

"Wyn," the felicity his voice exuded sent her pulse racing, " I have counted the days until I would see you once more."

A small laugh of disbelief erupted from her throat.

"I have!" He protested in mock indignation.

"Really?" She lifted her head from his chest, her brown eyes meeting blue, "how many, then?"

"Twenty four."

Her stomach stirred at the sobriety of his speech, the intensity of his stare. She detangled herself from his embrace before he could notice the shiver that traveled down her spine, or the trembling of her legs. The cold air was a stark reminder of her loneliness as she stepped back from his cocoon of warmth.

"Why do you pull away from me?"

Wyn imagined she heard hurt in his voice, but she found she could not force herself to look up from the ground, and dismissed it.

"I have known you for two years, Wyn, and in all that time I have never been able to ascertain your feelings towards me. I am well aware of your love for me as a friend. Yet whether your love goes beyond that, I am not capable of deciphering."

He had spoken slowly and surely, yet Wyn was engulfed by confusion. Her heart was pounding vigorously against her chest, and her eyes had begun to moisten. She longed to tell him that she was in love with him, but lacked the courage. She could not bear to lose his friendship, couldn't bear to watch his face as he withdrew from her, as he refused her. She briefly wondered if perhaps he felt the same way, perhaps that is why he brought it up, yet this thought was quickly destroyed by her many insecurities.

Finally she removed her gaze from the ground, and, for a moment, simply admired him. His lean figure, the ebony hair that fell around his shoulders, the bright eyes that regarded her so vehemently. And for a moment she felt as if she could tell him, felt the words on the tip of her tongue, felt as if the burden had already been lifted off her shoulders. She nearly collapsed in tears as that moment passed away as quickly as it had come.

"You need not worry. I feel nothing for you but friendship."

The words burned her tongue as it formed them, falling from her mouth excruciatingly slow, it seemed as if eternity had passed by the time the final syllable was pronounced. He broke eye contact with her, his jaw clenching repeatedly as he seemed to search for something to say.

"It is most unfortunate, then, that I am in love with you."

A gasp escaped her lips before she had even processed the words. Sobs soon followed, and in mere seconds tears were pouring down her cheeks.

"I am sorry, Wyn," Elladan's brows furrowed, misery etched upon his perfect features, "I did not realize my love for you would be so unwelcome. I swear I will not bring it up again."

With a final glance he turned to walk away.

"Wait."

It was spoken so softly that even his elven ears could not hear it, his pace quick as he moved farther away from her.

"_I love you!_"

He froze mid-step, pivoting around to see her, his eyes narrowed in confusion.

"I'm in love with you," Her voice was hoarse, though she had ceased crying, her cheeks tear stained. Yet it did not matter. She had said it, and felt a sudden wave of regret. She wished she could snatch the words back, place them deep within her once more, never to be found. Even with the security of his returned ardor she feared speaking those words. How she despised herself in that moment.

"You love me?"

Her stomach knotted at the obvious skepticism in his question. She could only nod.

"Then why--" his voice cut off, as if the pain of her denial had stolen the breath from his lungs.

"I was scared. I still am scared. I don't deserve you! I am weak, and insecure, and…"

Her rambling trailed into silence as he rapidly closed the distance between them, until finally his mouth hovered over hers, their breathing ragged, the air emitted from their mouths intermingling. She closed her eyes, leaning into the caress of his hand on her cheek. Seconds stretched, minutes expanded, time slowed as if catering to their wish of this moment lasting forever. Then his lips brushed hers, sweet and soft, and Wyn managed to find a way to convey her love to him without speaking a word.

**The End.**

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